Mart-deBlog

1300 this afternoon I gave the final speech of a biotechnology debate, and then I was finished. Finished with my bachelors. Finished with my science education. Finished with Holland. But I try to repeat over and over "finished", "finished." But it just doesn't really get through, I just don't realize it that I finished. I don't even realize with what exactly, I finished. I sort of half remember how I finished it. Last week was a tour de force of masochistic labor. I love it though. To work like a machine, kick people out of room, and continue until the sun starts shining. To work in my tiny messy room, in the darkness, on Aquinas, who worked like a machine hundreds of years ago in his dark monastery. But all that was when I still wasn't finished. That I realize. Being finished I don't. I know that I start realizing the moment I get nostalgic, emotional and introvert. Normally that always happens somewhere on the last night. Right now, I am not feeling anything really. It is 22.40 now, I am a little tipsy, but I know things will get worst. It is the end of the semester party. When everything is supposed to get crazy.

Although... I can already hear some whispers. "that was how fast childhood went by." "from now on life is serious." "you didn't enjoy it enough."

But these voices are simply too soft for the drone of sleep and bewilderment. Thus, probably this post will be a trilogy. When the end sinks in, I write the sequel.